We invite you to a series of articles devoted to exerting influence in relationships with others. You will learn how to recognize influence techniques in relationships with others and use them to defend business interests. Today we will discuss the rule of reciprocity and the rule of commitment and consistency – learn more about them.
The Rule of Reciprocity
The rule of reciprocity is one of the most widespread rules of conduct. It states that we should always try to reciprocate received good. It arouses in us a “sense of obligation.” This is a specific state of arousal that is unpleasant for humans, which is why they try to return received favors as quickly as possible. Moreover, a person is willing to do much more than a simple exchange would require, just to free themselves from this feeling. It is important to note that unsolicited favors also arouse a sense of obligation in us. The need to relieve the feeling of obligation can be so great that we often react even toward people we don’t know. For example, a professor randomly selected names from a phone book and then sent those people Christmas cards. In response, he was flooded with cards from people who didn’t know him or had never heard of him. This rule is very strongly instilled in the upbringing process and highly observed in adult life.
Applying the Law of Obligation:
Creating a need or obligation in another person – it’s worth considering what you can do, give, or say to create such an obligation. It could be a service, information, concession, favor, gesture, compliment, gifts, invitations, your time, etc.
The following manipulative techniques are based on the rule of reciprocity: “from benefactor to beggar” and “door-in-the-face.”
Sequence of the “From Benefactor to Beggar” Tactic:
- Doing a favor
- Waiting briefly
- Asking for a favor
Preceding a request with even a small and unsolicited favor increases its effectiveness about fivefold.
Sequence of the “Door-in-the-Face” Tactic:
- Large request
- Withdrawal
- Small request
In reality, the requester wants to obtain agreement to the small request; the large one is put forward only to increase the chance of success. Presenting requests in such a sequence increases effectiveness about twelvefold. However, to achieve such effectiveness, certain conditions must be met: both requests must be presented by the same person, and not too much time can pass between the first and second request. Additionally, the second request cannot be unrealistically large, as the requester will be perceived as unserious. The source of this tactic’s strength, besides the rule of reciprocity (I concede – you should reciprocate with a concession), is the rule of contrast (the second request seems small compared to the first).
The Rule of Commitment and Consistency
The rule of commitment and consistency can be most simply described by Leonardo da Vinci’s statement: “It is easier to say ‘no’ at the beginning than at the end.” This principle draws its strength from a value system in which consistency is considered a positive trait, while inconsistency has a clearly negative evaluation. People strive for agreement between their words, beliefs, and actions, and will defend a once-adopted position. They will be inclined to comply with requests consistent with that position, with their commitment.
Additionally, consistency protects us from the effort of thinking. The factor activating this mechanism is commitment, which makes it difficult for us to withdraw. One small initial decision is enough, and the rest follows.
The “Foot-in-the-Door” Tactic
It is based on the assumption that fulfilling a “small” request increases the probability of fulfilling a “larger” request. If someone agrees to perform a desired action, they perceive themselves as a helpful person. If we ask this person again, this time for something larger, they will probably also agree. Wanting to remain consistent with the first impression and with the way they perceive themselves, a person agrees to even greater sacrifice.
This tactic involves using a sequence of requests, from the smallest to increasingly larger ones. This first request can be really small, but it’s enough to put a person on the “slippery slope” of increasing commitment.
For example, to the question “Could I have 30 seconds of your time?” most would answer affirmatively. A person would consider themselves helpful in this specific situation, so to maintain this self-image, they will probably agree to the second request as well.
It is a fact that even seemingly harmless concession, such as signing under a certain view or expressing it publicly, can cause a change in self-perception, a change in views or behavior.
Read Also
- Exerting Influence in Practice Part 2
- Leader Without a Title - How to Influence Others When You Lack Formal Authority
- Practical Techniques for Increasing Social Influence Based on Understanding Brain Function
Read also
- Exerting Influence in Practice Part 2
- Practical Techniques for Increasing Social Influence Based on Understanding Brain Function
- Leader Without a Title - How to Influence Others When You Lack Formal Authority
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Frequently Asked Questions
What is the rule of reciprocity and how is it used in influence?
The rule of reciprocity states that people feel a strong obligation to return favors they have received, even unsolicited ones. This psychological mechanism is so powerful that people often reciprocate with actions far exceeding the original favor, simply to free themselves from the unpleasant feeling of obligation. It forms the basis for influence techniques like “door-in-the-face” and “from benefactor to beggar.”
How does the “door-in-the-face” technique work?
The door-in-the-face technique involves first making a large request that is expected to be refused, then following up with a smaller request that is the actual goal. Presenting requests in this sequence can increase effectiveness up to twelvefold, drawing its power from both the reciprocity principle and the contrast effect that makes the second request seem much more reasonable.
What is the “foot-in-the-door” technique?
The foot-in-the-door technique is based on the rule of commitment and consistency, where fulfilling a small initial request significantly increases the probability of agreeing to a larger subsequent request. Once a person agrees to a small action, they begin to perceive themselves as helpful and will strive to maintain that self-image by agreeing to progressively larger commitments.
How can understanding these influence mechanisms help in business?
Recognizing influence techniques allows professionals to both apply them ethically in negotiations and business relationships, and defend against manipulative use by others. Understanding mechanisms like reciprocity and commitment helps in structuring proposals, building long-term client relationships, and making more conscious decisions when under social pressure.